Ben Stein gets it

Apparently the White House referred to Christmas Trees as Holiday Trees for the first time this year, which prompted CBS presenter, Ben Stein, to present this piece which I would like to share with you.

The following was written by Ben Stein and recited by him on CBS Sunday Morning Commentary.

My confession:
I am a Jew, and every single one of my ancestors was Jewish. And it does not bother me even a little bit when people call those beautiful lit up, bejewelled trees, Christmas trees. I don't feel threatened. I don't feel discriminated against. That's what they are, Christmas trees.

It doesn't bother me a bit when people say, 'Merry Christmas' to me. I don't think they are slighting me or getting ready to put me in a ghetto. In fact, I kind of like it. It shows that we are all brothers and sisters celebrating this happy time of year. It doesn't bother me at all that there is a manger scene on display at a key intersection near my beach house in Malibu. If people want a nativity scene, it's just as fine with me as is the Menorah a few hundred yards away.

I don't like getting pushed around for being a Jew, and I don't think Christians like getting pushed around for being Christians. I think people who believe in God are sick and tired of getting pushed around, period. I have no idea where the concept came from, that America is an explicitly atheist country. I can't find it in the Constitution and I don't like it being shoved down my throat.

Or maybe I can put it another way: where did the idea come from that we should worship celebrities and we aren't allowed to worship God? I guess that's a sign that I'm getting old, too. But there are a lot of us who are wondering where these celebrities came from and where the America we knew went to.

In light of the many jokes we send to one another for a laugh, this is a little different: This is not intended to be a joke; it's not funny, it's intended to get you thinking.

Billy Graham's daughter was interviewed on the Early Show and Jane Clayson asked her 'How could God let something like this happen?' (regarding Hurricane Katrina). Anne Graham gave an extremely profound and insightful response. She said, 'I believe God is deeply saddened by this, just as we are, but for years we've been telling God to get out of our schools, to get out of our government and to get out of our lives.And being the gentleman He is, I believe He has calmly backed out. How can we expect God to give us His blessing and His protection if we demand He leave us alone?'

In light of recent events... terrorist attacks, school shootings, etc. I think it started when Madeleine Murray O'Hare (she was murdered, her body found a few years ago) complained she didn't want prayer in our schools, and we said OK. Then someone said you better not read the Bible in school. The Bible says thou shalt not kill; thou shalt not steal, and love your neighbor as yourself. And we said OK.

Then Dr. Benjamin Spock said we shouldn't spank our children when they misbehave, because their little personalities would be warped and we might damage their self-esteem (Dr. Spock's son committed suicide). We said an expert should know what he's talking about. And we said okay.

Now we're asking ourselves why our children have no conscience, why they don't know right from wrong, and why it doesn't bother them to kill strangers, their classmates, and themselves.

Probably, if we think about it long and hard enough, we can figure it out. I think it has a great deal to do with 'WE REAP WHAT WE SOW.'

Funny how simple it is for people to trash God and then wonder why the world's going to hell.
Funny how we believe what the newspapers say, but question what the Bible says.

Funny how you can send 'jokes' through e-mail and they spread like wildfire, but when you start sending messages regarding the Lord, people think twice about sharing.

Funny how lewd, crude, vulgar and obscene articles pass freely through cyberspace, but public discussion of God is suppressed in the school and workplace.

Are you laughing yet?

Funny how when you forward this message, you will not send it to many on your address list because you're not sure what they believe, or what they will think of you for sending it.

Funny how we can be more worried about what other people think of us than what God thinks of us.

Pass it on if you think it has merit.

If not, then just discard it.... no one will know you did. But, if you discard this thought process, don't sit back and complain about what a bad shape the world is in.

My Best Regards, Honestly and respectfully,

Ben Stein

If the government sold flowers.

Disclaimer: To Barry's fans, for the record, this is HUMOR. Relax, No need to be franticly searching snopes to disprove it.

(Receptionist) Hello, Welcome to ObamaFlowers, My name is Trina. How can I help you?

(Customer) Hello, I received an email from Professional Flowers stating that my flower order has been canceled and I should go to your exchange to reorder it. I tried your website, but it seems like it is not working. So I am calling the 800 number.



(Receptionist) Yes, I am sorry about the website. It should be fixed by the end of November. But I can help you.



(Customer) Thanks, I ordered a "Spring Bouquet" for our anniversary, and wanted it delivered to my wife.



(Receptionist Interrupting) Sir, "Spring Bouquets" do not meet our minimum standards, I will be happy to provide you with Red Roses.



(Customer) But I have always ordered "Spring Bouquets", done it for years, my wife likes them.



(Receptionist) Roses are better, sir, I am sure your wife will love them.



(Customer) Well, how much are they?



(Receptionist) It depends sir, do you want our Bronze, Silver, Gold or Platinum package.



(Customer) What's the difference?



(Receptionist) 6, 12,18 or 24 Red Roses.



(Customer) The Silver package may be okay, how much is it?



(Receptionist) It depends sir, what is your monthly income?



(Customer) What does that have to do with anything?



(Receptionist) I need that to determine your government flower subsidy, then I can determine how much your out of pocket cost will be. But if your income is below our minimums for a subsidy, then I can refer you to our FlowerAid department.



(Customer) FlowerAid?



(Receptionist) Yes, Flowers are a Right, everyone has a right to flowers. So, if you can't afford them, then the government will supply them free of charge.



(Customer) Who said they were a Right?



(Receptionist) Congress passed it, the President signed it and the Supreme Court found it Constitutional.



(Customer) Whoa.....I don't remember seeing anything in the Constitution regarding Flowers as a Right.



(Receptionist) It is not really a Right in the Constitution, but ObamaFlowers is Constitutional because the Supreme Court Ruled it a "Tax". Taxes are Constitutional. But we feel it is a Right.



(Customer) I don't believe this...



(Receptionist) It's the law of the land sir. Now, we anticipated most people would go for the Silver Package, so what is your monthly income sir?



(Customer) Forget it, I think I will forgo the flowers this year.



(Receptionist) In that case sir, I will still need your monthly income.



(Customer) Why?



(Receptionist) To determine what your 'non-participation' cost would be.



(Customer) WHAT? Your can't charge me for NOT buying flowers!



(Receptionist) It's the law of the land, sir, approved by the Supreme Court. It's $9.50 or 1% of your monthly income.....



(Customer)interrupting) This is ridiculous, I'll pay the $9.50..



(Receptionist) Sir, it is the $9.50 or 1% of your monthly income, whichever is greater.



(Customer) ARE YOU KIDDING ME? What a ripoff!!



(Receptionist) Actually sir, it is a good deal. Next year it will be 2%.



(Customer) Look, I'm going to call my Congressman to find out what's going on here. This is ridiculous. I'm not going to pay it.



(Receptionist) Sorry to hear that sir, that's why I had the NSA track this call and obtain the make and model of the cell phone your are using.



(Customer) Why does the NSA need to know what kind of CELL PHONE I AM USING?



(Receptionist) So they get your GPS coordinates sir



(Door Bell rings followed immediately by a loud knock on the door)



(Receptionist) That would be the IRS sir. Thanks for calling ObamaFlowers, have a nice day...and God Bless America.